Is it true? Kind? And necessary?

I was reading a blog post the other day and while I can't remember what exactly it was about in detail (I rarely do... not sure my brain is fully switched on when I read. Or listen for that matter...) I do remember this: before we speak, we should ask ourselves whether what we are about to say is true, kind and necessary.

To be honest, a lot of what I say doesn't tick all these three boxes. That's a little sad, right? I've been thinking about my way to communicate quite a bit recently. I used to feel strongly about 'letting it all out', about not building up the anger inside. And while it can sometimes be helpful to talk about stuff, more often than not just having an angry rant isn't helpful at all but prevents me from letting go. I also wonder how much this is a sub-conscious exercise of seeking validation: e.g. surely I have every right to be pissed off?! 

Which leads me to another question: what is happening to my internal 'barometer'? I seem to be torn between being very opinionated and internal on the one hand, and on the other hand extremely insecure and clueless about 'objectively' assessing a situation (and myself). 

As always, many questions in my head, and not so many answers. Certainly no definite answers. Baby steps: if I can try to pause before I speak. And check especially for kindness and necessity (I'm not much of a liar). And then - more often than not - not speak after all...