Gefühlte Nähe

Whenever I am in Germany (this is used to be once or twice a year, but has become more like at least once a month recently), I make the time to visit a bookshop. Thanks to amazon, I can get almost any German book I like over here, but I find browsing in a shop still easier than online. Especially, when I am not looking for anything in particular. It's really a matter of coincidences which books I eventually end up buying. If I like the cover and/or the title of a book, I'll pick it up and if the short summary is appealing, I'll buy it.

On my most recent visit, I picked up "Gefühlte Nähe" by Harald Martenstein. Mr. Martenstein is probably most famous for his column in the weekly newspaper Die Zeit.

The book consists of 23 chapters. We meet the 23 lovers/boyfriends of N. Each chapter is written from their point of view. We never find out N.'s name, nor any of her thoughts or feelings.

I liked the idea. Getting to know the character through other people's eyes. The book was easy to read and I finished it within two days (doesn't happen often to me). Overall I liked the author's style. But it also left me disappointed. I think the idea was poorly implemented.

We don't get to know N. very well at all. Most (if not all), of her lovers are either married or in a relationship. The picture that is being painted of these relationships is a rather sad one. The basic message seems to be that people are selfish, egotistical assholes. While there might be affection and certainly a lot of sex, there is no sense of love in any of the relationships. The choice for the men seems to be between a lukewarm marriage and an exciting affair with somebody they wouldn't really want to be with full-time either.

With every chapter my hope that N. would find 'true love' shrunk a little further and I became more and more irritated. Irritated with her choices, with the men's behaviour. And I was asking myself, whether my views on relationships are really that far removed from reality.

I hope not.

Lying on the sofa, reading and enjoying Danish pastries - perfect!